I wanted to regale you all you all with the tale of a man with a thick Louth accent explaining the plot of the movie Falling Down to his friend as they meandered down Grafton Street just behind me and at exactly the same pace on Wednesday.
But there is no method I know of to transcribe convincingly the truly magnificent mangling of vowels and phonemes that people from that part of the country are capable of. I know of no combination of written letters that could do it justice. It seems easy enough to do it for Dublin and Belfast, but impossible for that bit of land that lies smack bang equidistant between them. And my story would be bland and unremarkable without it.
Do let me know if any of you have figured out how to do that, as I'd love to tell you all about it.
Or just have yourselves a nice weekend. That'll do.