Friday, March 13, 2009

I'm Eoin McLove, I can have you killed

I wanted to regale you all you all with the tale of a man with a thick Louth accent explaining the plot of the movie Falling Down to his friend as they meandered down Grafton Street just behind me and at exactly the same pace on Wednesday.

But there is no method I know of to transcribe convincingly the truly magnificent mangling of vowels and phonemes that people from that part of the country are capable of. I know of no combination of written letters that could do it justice. It seems easy enough to do it for Dublin and Belfast, but impossible for that bit of land that lies smack bang equidistant between them. And my story would be bland and unremarkable without it.

Do let me know if any of you have figured out how to do that, as I'd love to tell you all about it.

Or just have yourselves a nice weekend. That'll do.

15 comment(s):

Anonymous said...

I couldn't possibly transcribe it, but I can give you a Wee County phonetics demo some night in the pub.

Gwan de toooooouuuuuuuhhhhhhn.

Anonymous said...

yeouiy

is my best attempt at rendering a Louth "you".

Andrew said...

Nice.

'Down' in Dublinese is "dowin" and in Belfastian is "doyn", so In louth it must be something like "Doowuwuuuoyin".

Three ducks are flying over Belfast. the first one says "quack". The second one says "quack". And the third one says "I'm going as quack as I can!"

It's the way I tell 'em.

B said...

record it, upload it, sorted

Anonymous said...

From what I remember of the Louth accent, you could throw all your pots and pans down a flight of stairs, and record yourself telling the story over the ensuing noise. Or am I confusing it with the Limerick one?

Jo said...

Ha, my nephew is from Drogheda. He's nearly two, and it can only get funnier.

White Rabbit said...

I've never even been to Louth!

morgor said...

The dundalk accent is the funniest.

No-one understands what they say, not even each other.

A mate of mine is from there and it's been a long running joke that we get him to repeat all of his sentences and then ask him to write it down.

Andrew said...

B - i would, but I can't do a particularly good impressionof the accent. And no-one wants to listen to a bad attempt at a Louth accent.

Tessa - Yeah, that's about right.

Jo - So much to look forward to. When he's a bit older and it's a little more appropriate, get him to say "Youse hairy bastards" and prepare to crap yourself laughing.

Le Nord - But you're from Belfast, aren't you? Does that mean you've never been south? Or never been to Dublin? or that you fly everywhere for fear of having to stop for petrol in Drrrraaaaawwwwwggghhedddaaa?

Morgor - Aye, it's priceless. good to know you're keeping him in his place.

Anonymous said...

Givush a Schtayr Bayr thayer naow.

Translates as "May I please have a Star Bar?".

Anonymous said...

Seems like the Louth accent can be related to Danish. Not a consonant pronounced in that language, but very many vowels...

Anonymous said...

The title of your post is enough

Anonymous said...

enough as in very funny and says it all.

Rosie said...

Givush a Schtayr Bayr thayer naow.

take a Navan man, add Buckfast, stir.

Andrew said...

narocroc - A truly heroic effort there. The "naow" sounds absolutely spot-on.

Lizzie - I suppose the train from Dublin to Belfast would spare you from having to spend much time in Louth. Actually, Louth is fine, it's just hilarious when the inhabitants speak.

Milan - Cheers, but the title doesn't reflect the glory of the way those words were spoken. I actually felt a little ashamed writing them in such a flat manner.

Rosie - A sexy scenario, I think we'd all agree.