Saturday, July 5, 2008

17

Zimbabwe



After mentioning Bryan Mukandi's new blog Outside In the other day I also said that I imagined he would post something about Zimbabwe soon. It turned out that he hadn't been planning to do so but he obliged me anyway with this post. He then challenged me to write a post of my own about it in the comments on my post. So, hesitant as I am to do so, here's my post.

In his piece, Bryan talks about how 'abstract suffering', such as seeing footage of things like the earthquake in China, are painful but bearable, because they do not really impinge on our lives in any way. Bryan is Zimbabwean, so the situation there is very different for him. I can't even begin to imagine what it must be like having friends and relations stuck in a country ruled by a despot who refuses to give his people any choice whatsoever and brings violence and misery to those who stand up to him. Then, while doing a little research into this topic (I never thought I'd find myself doing research for this blog!) I came across this picture at the top of the article. You would have to made of stone not to be deeply upset by this image. This is Blessing Mabhena, an 11 month old boy, whose legs were deliberately broken by Robert Mugabe's thugs in order to punish his father for being an opposition councillor in Zimbabwe. You can read the full story here. I found myself just staring blankly at the computer screen for about ten minutes after reading this story, unsure of what to do next.

Yet this is just the tip of the iceberg; one of thousands of horror stories of atrocities committed by the followers of Mugabe in order to intimidate and terrify anyone who dares oppose him. What can anyone do in the face of such actions? It was a sad day when Morgan Tsvangirai announced he was stepping down as the opposition candidate to Mugabe but entirely understandable. The man knew that he was placing the lives of thousands of his followers as well as his family and loved ones into jeopardy. He was fighting a battle he could not possibly win.

For footage of just how ludicrously easy it was for Mugabe to rig the vote in Zimbabwe check out this incredible video clip from The Guardian.

I know a few people from Zimbabwe. They are mostly, but not solely, white. Whatever you feel about the way land was divided up in Zimbabwe before and after the break up of Rhodesia, there is nothing that can excuse what many white farmers and landowners have had to go through in the past few years. People who have never lived anywhere else have had their life's possession taken away from them and been forced into exile. I have genuine sympathy for those who resent the long history of white supremacy in their country but looting and random beatings are no way of resolving a long and complicated issue. Good people have had absolutely everything taken from them and will never get it back.

As a child I lived for three years in Tanzania in east Africa. I attended a local school in the city of Dodoma, which was nominally the capital although in reality all power at the time resided in Dar Es Salaam. When the Tanzanian president at the time Ali Hassan Mwinyi and his Kenyan equivalent, the monstrously corrupt Daniel Arap Moi visited the city all local schoolchildren were required to stand on the roadside waving flags and cheering on these great leaders, blissfully unaware of just how rich these men were becoming, as thousands of their nations' children slept on pavements and foraged in rubbish dumps for food.

Africa has long had to endure the spectre of the 'untouchable' leader, who cannot be publicly criticised without reprisal. This is where things really need to change, and hopefully they might just be starting to. South Africa's spineless president Thabo Mbeki has been notoriously reluctant to speak out against the Zimbabwean administration in any way. Thankfully, his infinitely wiser and braver predecessor Nelson Mandela has not, criticising Mugabe for his 'tragic failure of leadership'. And I'm delighted to see my old home country refuse to recognise Mugabe's win in the recent election, along with many other countries in the African Union.

Much more of this kind of leadership will be required if Zimbabwe is ever to climb out of the pit Mugabe and his cronies have brought it to. Thankfully, it appears that the hope, the brains and the bravery to do so still exist. Enough is enough.


To follow the Zimbabwean story carefully check out the superb This Is Zimbabwe Blog.

Friday, July 4, 2008

6

Brotherly bonding.

Well, very soon after writing the last post my iPod turned up. It was in the last place I looked for it.

Which meant I was able to get a nice solid 3 hours sleep before getting up hideously early to drive the little bro for an interview with Aer Lingus at Dublin Airport. Sadly my car radio doesn't work so we had to plug the iPod into dodgy laptop speakers that only worked occasionally, and with all the clarity of a radio station broadcasting form Antarctica when they did. We named them 'Ice Station Zebra'. Bruce Springsteen's Radio Nowhere never sounded more suitable than when limping out of those speakers.

Having reached the airport with heaps of time to spare, I had the chance to rediscover why I love sausage and egg McMuffins so much. Truly the best thing they ever did.

Then it was time to find the Aer Lingus building itself and get thoroughly drenched in the process. The bro was looking dashing in a suit but I had gone undercover as a skanger for the day. Aer Lingus look at bedraggled skangers quite dubiously when they rock up and slump into their comfy sofas in the main lobby looking like they might fall asleep at any moment. We were soon urged to move into a "more private" waiting room, where my bro could work on his epic pile of paperwork for Aer Lingus and Dublin Airport Authority - which mostly consists of writing 'I am not a terrorist' a couple of thousand times. Unable to take any situation seriously that doesn't affect me directly, and even worse when underslept, I proceeded to wreck his head my attempting to build myself a little fort with the chairs in the waiting room, writing 'semtex' under the Interests section of his form, then picking up his Leaving Cert results and sneering "loser". I then enlightened him with the 3 Golden Rules for Job Interviews:



1. Never use the word 'I'. Refer to yourself only in the third person or as 'The Talent'.

2. Always adress the interviewer as 'sweetheart', whether they be male or female. Women will think you're a lovable charmer and men will think you're side-splittingly hilarious.

3. Conclude the interview with the line "Look sweetheart, The Talent didn't come here to fuck around. He's hot shit right now so he'll be looking for big bucks on this one."

Another applicant came into the room while my bro was in the interview and I was engaging in a phenomenally good nose-pick but I soon saw him off by making him the same offer some guy made to Lottie on the Dart.

When the bro returned to finish off his paperwork another applicant came in and I graciously allowed him to stay for a while. Despite my appearance he asked, with seeming sincerity, which job I was going for. I pursed my lips and replied "Junior Vice-President". When he was summoned for his interview my brother magnanimously wished him luck, while I offered up an alternative pronunciation of the word 'analyst'.

Good times.

Thursday, July 3, 2008

7

Lost

Goddammit, i can't find my iPod. This is not good.

I lost one before by leaving it on a bus to Kilkenny. Which is why the mention of that place still makes me a little sad, despite some recent very positive experiences there - which someone else has blogged about far better than I could.

I'm driving my bro to the airport tomorrow for an interview at a ridiculously early hour of the day and am likely to be doing a lot of hanging around. I need the fucking thing.

My music collection is now spread across two computers so reloading it all would be long and painful.

Bet I left it in my car and some little fucker grabbed it before I had the thing locked.

Mr. Apple, if you're reading this I promise to rave about iPods every day for the next six months if you'll give me a free one. Both my readers are very suggestible.

I know, "it'll be in the last place I look", etc.

Wednesday, July 2, 2008

3

Outside In

Before I proceed to what I want to say, let me just thank those of you who wished me luck in my job interview yesterday and those of you who asked how I got on. The answer to that is in comment 3 on my last post.

Now, he's already been linked to by Mulley and the other bloggers on the Irish Times site so i doubt he needs my help, but I'm still gonna point you in the direction of Bryan Mukandi's new blog Outside In on the funky new Irish Times website. In a rather silly oversight, if you go to www.irishtimes.com/blogs you won't find it listed, but I'm sure they'll fix that soon.

Bryan is Zimbabwean, so I'm sure he'll have some pretty strong thoughts on what's going on there to come soon. I'd been thinking about tackling the subject myself but I think I might wait and see what a vastly more-informed person makes of it first before adding my own tuppence-worth. I've been looking for something to fill the void in my life left by the sad departure of Shane Hegarty's blog and I reckon this might just be it.
8

What Others Were Feeling Like Today #6

1973

Had to do an interview for American TV on the lawns of Shepperton Studios to promote The Homecoming film. ‘Who would you like to be if you weren’t Peter Hall?’ said the interviewer. I have never considered this before. I had to be honest and say that I had no desire to be anyone else at all. I’d like to be a better me, a cleverer me, a more organised me. And wouldn’t mind being a me of twenty-eight knowing what I knew at forty. But the thought of being somebody else is inconceivable. Not because I’m particularly pleased with myself – I just can’t imagine being somebody else. Perhaps you only want to be somebody else when you are very much in love. You want to become the other person.

Peter Hall
2

Work is bad

Eeeep...job interview in an hour and a half.

I don't want a job, how am I supposed to play with all my new friends on the internet?

Or manage to trot out a short little post every two out of three days?

Will I have to go to bed before 4 am some nights?

And shouldn't I be going for my fortnightly shower now instead of being online?

I don't like this at all.

Tuesday, July 1, 2008

4

Visit to the Doc

Me: Hi doctor, I’ve just been having these stomach pains quite a bit lately and they’ve been worse the last couple of days.

Dr. O’Leary: I see. Tell me, do you masturbate much?

Me: Huh? Umm, well y’know…is that really relevant? The pains are only in my stomach, nowhere else.

Dr. O’Leary: If you could just answer the question honestly, please.

Me: OK, well, like, yeah, but I wouldn’t say a freakish amount or anything…

Dr. O’Leary: Fucking great, isn’t it?